User blog:Hateskyrocketmelon/Update (19/01/2022)

Update (19/01/2022):

I am very angered right now, but my anger has nothing to do with sky rocket melons. My anger is to do with my nemeses, and how they have beaten me. I should redirect my anger at the sky rocket melons, however it is proving difficult to do. I really want to hate sky rocket melons, I want to hate them so badly. I should be able to be annoyed at something simple, it would be so much easier to hate a melon, rather than to hate myself, and be swallowed by my insecurities. I wish I were able to be less consumed by all these confusing thoughts and self doubt. Sometimes I wish I could go back to monkey, and be less conscious. So, I'll just continue to pretend, and keep this façade on. I'll just continue to hate sky rocket melons, that's all I know how to do. I'll keep things simple, and push all these troubles out of my head.

I just can't keep thinking like this, I feel just so defeated so I'll continue to hate. I'll continue to focus all this negative energy on sky rocket melons. This is what I need to do. I'll continue to hate sky rocket melons, and push everything down until it all goes away. Then the only thing left will be my hatred of sky rocket melons. And isn't being angry far easier than hurting? than feeling this pain? If I push everything away, then there'll be nothing left to cause me hurt, there'll be nothing left for me to worry about.

I just hate caring so much. So, from now on, all I'll care about is how awful sky rocket melons are, and I'll never have to hurt again.